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Sophia

Dec 17, 2018 | Sacred Stories, Women's Wisdom

Wisdom seeking is difficult because, as Martha Nussbaum has written, “Knowing can be violent, given the truths that are there to be known.” What this means for us is that in order to live on wisdom’s path, we will have to give up the illusion of safety. If we try to secure our safety, we will continually be doomed to dwell in fields of hesitation, stalled in neutral, forever wavering in the wind. ~ From Chasing Sophia, by Lillian Calles Barger

In this place, this time, this world, where do we turn for wisdom?

There are many places, many voices, many sources to be sure. And some are better than others. The one I encourage (and the one I work to rely upon myself)? The wisdom that’s yours! That know-that-you-know-that-you-know voice within that sometimes whispers, sometimes shouts, and is always speaking.

How do I know? And how can you trust that this is so, that what you hear is reliable, trustworthy, and true?

Enter Sophia.

Wisdom Herself. Present at all times. The word itself that’s used to define and describe such knowing in the Sacred Text. And yes, a woman.

She’s one of the 52 stories I reimagine, retell, and redeem through SacredReadings. And it’s possible that She is the one who will choose you for 2019 and beyond.

Believe me: no matter who shows up on your behalf, whether Sophia or not, the wisdom (and encouragement and blessing and hope) within will speak perfectly and poignantly to and for you. I promise. How and why can I do such a thing? Because their wisdom (and encouragement and blessing and hope) continue to speak to me – over and over again.

And what I’ve come to realize is this:

These ancient, sacred stories of women are in our blood – longing to be heard and everpresent – offering us all the wisdom we desire and deserve. They are our matrlineal line and birthright. They are yours.

Stories that Still Speak

Dec 15, 2018 | Sacred Stories, Women's Voice & Power, Women's Wisdom, Writing

I’ve been awake for hours. Christmas tree lights on. Coffee made. Fire lit. Snuggled up on the couch. Laptop on. I’ve been working on New Year SacredReadings – the 6th year in a row (!!) I’ve offered them.

You’d think these stories must be repetitive to me by now, yes? But exactly the opposite is true. With each card I pull, I realize a truth to this particular story (and then the next one and then the next one…) that is actually tied to my own. I hear her voice speaking into my heart. And as the minutes and hours tick by, I find myself surrounded by text (and women’s wisdom) that yes, I am offering to others, but that feels like it’s all for me.

Which, of course, is why I continue to do this work – and offer it to others: these stories still speak!

None of this is surprising – at least not to me.

These are ancient, sacred stories of women who have been, for the most part, marginalized and misunderstood. Still, all the while, they have laid in wait – longing to be heard, longing to be seen, longing to be known and trusted and called on for their wisdom, encouragement, and grace. Every single one of them has lived through things unfathomable to us . . . and . . . all too real and relevant even still. Every single one of them knows what it means to pursue desire and have it thwarted. Every single one of them knows how it feels to be silenced or small (but to refuse such!) Every single one of them knows what it means to abide in a world of patriarchal power and yet live a powerful and out-loud story in spite of it all. And every single one of them remain profoundly relevant.

As I work on their stories and hold the stories-and-hearts of those who have already purchased their 2019 New Year SacredReadings, I think of so many other women; all women, actually. And I feel such hope. Hope that these women’s stories – the ancient, sacred ones I love – will yet be heard, known, honored, and loved. Hope that you will discover which one of these stories is choosing you. Hope (and longing) that you might know and believe your story still speaks – in ways you have not yet imagined or dared to hope.

I’ll gladly wake up tomorrow and the remaining days of this year at the same early hour if it means that more and more of these ancient, sacred women’s stories can be placed into the hands and hearts of women today.

These stories (still) speak and we deeply, desperately, perhaps more than ever before, need to hear them.

May it be so.

A story about (in)visibility

Oct 1, 2018 | Hope & Encouragement, Sacred Stories, Sovereignty

Women: you are not unseen, unheard, or invisible! Ever!

Do you ever feel as though you (and other women) are unseen, unheard, invisible? As though your story doesn’t have all that much signi cance in the larger scheme of things?

Don’t believe it! Nothing could be further from the truth!

Your story is more than signi cant, more than profound, and more than critical to the larger, gorgeous, amazing drama that’s being woven and written around you. And your place, your voice, your role, your heart is right in the middle of it! I promise!

Want an example?

Not surprisingly, I’ve got one.

There is an ancient, sacred story told of a nameless woman. We know nothing about her other than what we can deduce: she was a daughter, a wife, and a mother. These alone, in my opinion, are more than enough to give her stature, merit, and value. Sparse details hardly limit the depth or scope of her significance. She lived a story that couldn’t help but change the world. Just like yours.

After Adam and Eve left the Garden they had two sons – Cain and Abel; later, a third. One day, in a fit of jealous rage, Cain killed his younger brother. (Makes eating that fruit seem relatively mild, doesn’t it?) His punishment was to wander the earth – a nomad, no home, no family. In fear for his ability to survive, he pleaded with the Divine to protect him; to somehow keep him from being killed by those who would seek his death. And so he was given a distinguishing mark that would forever protect him. And of course, this is where we get the phrase, “the mark of Cain.”

Later in the text we read that Cain settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden. Then this, Cain made love to his wife, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Enoch. (Genesis 4:17)

That’s it. Her only mention.

Now some would say such is not even worth the bother – for a blog post or a book chapter, let alone an attempt to offer some level of meaning to those who feel their stories are small, inconsequential, almost nonexistent.

Don’t believe it! Nothing could be further from the truth!

“…there are stories we will never find, no matter how many times we search the sacred texts. I think it was Marcia Falk who wrote, ‘What we cannot remember, we must imagine.’ And so we read between the lines, listening beneath the layers of suppression and neglect to hear the chorus of voices where we were told there was only silence.” ~ Jan Richardson, In Wisdom’s Path

In between the lines and listening between the layers. Expecting to hear a heartbeat of significance, meaning, and worth.

Imagining what we deeply, intuitively, and already/always know to be true: women’s stories matter. Just like yours.

Whether myth or historical fact matters not. Her story is true. Cain’s wife sings out the continuation of countless generations: hundreds of thousands of women who are unnamed but no less real; without position, but no less powerful; barely spoken of, but hardly silent; harmed, but deserving of healing, wholeness, and strength. Cain’s wife symbolizes every single page of life and death, hope and despair, triumph and tragedy that is being written, even if seemingly unseen and unheard. Cain’s wife signifies that women endure, period. Just like you.

And if this weren’t enough (though I believe it is), Cain’s wife is the first woman mentioned outside the Garden. Eve’s daughter-in-law. The wife of a marked-man. The bearer of Adam and Eve’s grandson. A mother who heard her husband’s stories and told them to her son. One who enabled generations to follow.

She lived a significant story. She is a significant woman. Just like you. Just like all women.

So if there are days or even seasons in which you feel as though your story is not worth mentioning, barely seen, a whisper that’s hardly heard in a noisy world, take heart! Cain’s wife stands alongside you in solidarity and strength. She reminds you that every story matters and that every woman’s ability to nurture, labor, grieve, laugh, cry, persevere, live, love, and bring forth life in any and every form is what enables the far larger story to even exist, let alone be told, endure, and thrive.

You are part of a legacy of a women who endure, who make a difference, who matter.

To ever think, let alone believe anything less is a lie. Cain’s wife calls you, me, all of us back to the truth. Hear her voice:

I see you. I hear you. I know your name. I love your story. You matter. You endure. You live. This alone is more than enough. You are more than enough. Take heart: you are my daughter, my lineage, my kin.

You’re Allowed to Run

Aug 7, 2018 | Sacred Stories, Women's Voice & Power

It is excruciating to be the victim of someone’s scorn, passive-aggressive behavior, or blatant harm. All of us have heard so many of these stories over the years. And…we’ve experienced the same. I doubt any of us are immune.

It is also excruciating to hear the voice within that tells us not one bit of this is ok and not respond in kind. We hear the voice that tells us to run, flee, get the heck out of dodge, but we don’t trust it; we don’t trust ourselves. Instead, we quickly see and tabulate the costs and consequences – and stand completely still. We don’t believe we have the strength to act, the capacity to survive, or the permission to consider anything other than persevering, staying put, grinning and bearing it. Believe me, I get it.

I hope you’ll also believe me when I say, You’re allowed to run!

I don’t necessarily mean this literally (though sometimes that’s exactly the right thing to do).

I do necessarily mean that you are wise-wise-wise to listen to your brilliance within that says “enough,” that stands up, that knows to walk-if-not-speed away – even if “only” emotionally and energetically – from places and persons that don’t serve you, don’t honor all you offer, don’t recognize all of who you are.

You’re allowed to run!

No matter how high the costs, vast the risks, or massive the consequences, you’re still allowed. I DO understand that you may very well choose not to. (Believe me, I get it.) But it matters that you know you have the right, the capacity, the strength, the permission, and most of  all, the desire.

Here’s what’s true: when you speak your inalienable “yes” or “no,” when you honor your intuition, when you trust your integrity-filled heart, and then run – no matter what that looks like for you, the Divine shows up – profoundly, miraculously, magically, overwhelmingly – because you do!

I am speaking from personal experience, to be sure. Even more, I am speaking on behalf of another woman – an ancient, sacred one – who lived EXACTLY this story. She was marginalized, abused, misunderstood, unheard, and unseen; still, she gave herself permission to run. And she did. Straight into the desert. (Not a spa-like, Palm Springs desert, mind you; a desolate desert. In some ways, she had to feel that things got worse instead of better. (Sound familiar?) But because she listened to the voice within that said “no more,” and because she acted, she was saved – in every possible way. She was seen/heard/met by the Divine. She was blessed immeasurably.

She walks (and runs) alongside you even now. You are, after all, her daughter, her lineage, her kin.

*****

This post is inspired by the ancient, sacred story of Hagar, the story that saved me in my darkest of times and hardest of seasons – in my own desolate desert. She is, undoubtedly, my favorite – and – I have believed, clung to, and remained certain that I am hers, as well. As are you. Did I mention? You are her daughter, her lineage, her kin.

4 Takeaways that Matter

Jul 17, 2018 | Hope & Encouragement, Sacred Stories, Women's Voice & Power

I spend countless hours in the midst of the ancient, sacred stories of women – wanting and wondering how to tell them, believing they matter, oft’ overwhelmed, admittedly, by the sneaky voice that tells me my readers won’t “get” their significance, their beauty, their relevance, their wisdom.

Regardless of the voice, my heart cannot let that happen. And so I press on.

We need these stories. We need these women. Why? Because we need muses, mentors, companions, even, midwives who call us forth and birth us into the lives that are ours to claim, to live, to love.

This is what these stories do. This is what these women do – over and over and over again.

The more value and worth we give to any woman’s story, the more value and worth we give to our own. And that, it seems to me, is worth any effort, any risk, decrying any voices within or without. (For me AND for you.)

So, all that said, here’s one of those stories (along with 4 takeaways that matter):

*****

Once upon a time there were two midwives who worked for a king. In an attempt to control the population of his slaves (who he feared would one day become his enemies), he told the midwives to kill every boy-child they birthed. They didn’t like this idea and so, chose to do nothing of the kind. Not soon after, the king called them on the carpet, demanding to know why they had not obeyed him. They said, “The Hebrew women are much too strong and fast! They have the child before we can even get there!” The ancient text tells us they did this because they respected and honored the Hebrew God (of whom they would have known little-to-nothing) more than they feared the king. And because of this, that same God blessed them with children of their own.

I can see a gazillion take-away’s from this story, but here are just four…for now:

  1. Do what you can’t not do – even before you feel ready. You are.
  2. Neither the voices within, nor those of “power” without have the final say. You do.
  3. Trust that life is yours to bring forth on your own and others’ behalf, no matter the risk. It is.
  4. Stand alongside other women – always and in all things. It matters.

The midwives (and countless others) stand alongside you…and me. And that’s the takeaway that matters most.

What I need you to remember:

Jul 9, 2018 | Hope & Encouragement, Sacred Stories, Sovereignty

We are desperate to see ourselves in powerful and empowering ways. It’s no wonder: we have too-often and for too long been deprived of stories that remind us who we truly are. We are ravenously hungry for those stories, for the stories of women in our lineage, our line.

Take heart! Though we live in a world that has based its predominant understanding of women on the (poorly told) story of Eve, there is another one, almost the very last story of a woman in the very same text, who once heard, makes all the difference, who does remind us of who we truly are – over and over and over again.

A while back, I made a video about her, the Woman of Revelation 12. And I’ve spent time writing more about her. Including this:

Remember who you are. Remember who you are. Remember who you are, she says.

Anything, anyone, all that has made you feel less than, even remotely disconnected from the truth that you reflect entire galaxies, that you are a veritable constellation of beauty and strength, has not really seen you and somehow, in such, you have forgotten. This breaks my heart.

Remember who you are. Put on your gown of sunlight. Step into your silver-as-the-moon stilettos. Place your crown that’s laden with glistening stars upon your head. And glow, glide, blaze through your world. Shine light in the darkest of places. Bring warmth to the coldest of nights. Sparkle brightly in the dingiest and dirtiest of places. And in your own darkness, cold, and less-than-desirable places? Turn within, turn within, turn within.

Remember who you are. Remember who you are. Remember who you are.

This is all you need to know, all you need to recall, all that ever matters.

If you will remember who you truly are, all the unnecessary and less-than-worthy things that have taken up space and energy and time in your life will fall away. If you will walk through your world today and all days embraced by the celestial light that is yours, you will not falter.

If you will remember me, the Woman of Revelation 12, you will, without question, be able to step into who you are, take your throne, and don your royal robes. And then, oh, then…you will be able to be you, be you, be you. The you you’ve always been – though sometimes disguised and distracted.  The you you’ve forgotten. The you the world has been waiting for. The you you have been waiting for. The you I have always remembered and will never forget.

Remember who you are. Remember who you are. Remember who you are. Rise up. Shine. Beam. And then some.

*******

Have I repeated it too much? Can I possibly express it enough? It’s all I want to say.

Even more true, it’s all I want to hear. It’s what I need to hear. It’s who I want to be. More than anything. And it’s what I want for you…more than anything.

Remember who are. Remember who you are. Remember who you are.